The dyadic view of the self posits that we are formed of two things, always. I'm sure there's a philosophy somewhere that's more developed than this on the same thing, but this is my blog, my philosophy, and my opinion. This dyad forms the central way in which we view ourselves, specifically, as a creature along an vector (note direction) in a space which contains all possible attributes. This vector is the displacement from the inferior to the superior, which are two points located in that space. Our goal should be to move along this vector, which should be named, along with the two points.
I have the concept of Gloria, the concept of Monika, and the vector between them. Gloria represents the "Is," associated with history, the current state, and other concepts that should be left behind. Monika represents the "Ought," associated with the future, idealization, and things that are desired. Previous dyads included [DEADNAME] and Monika, making the issue about "masculine" vs "feminine". Such a conceptualization is a failure of identity from the outset; the dyad is overburneded with unneccessary things and simultaneously fails to bin everything that can be thought. Everything I think should either be something that "Is" or something that "Ought" and I should "actualize" the "Ought" to be what "Is". We're doing this by moving Gloria. If something isn't true, or isn't ideal, we don't think about it. This is a glass cannon type conceptualization.
There was briefly a Monadic view of the Self. Without any vector to describe, the point is frameless in nature, and thus becomes the origin, and your concepts and conceptualization become zero. There is no process from this. But the mind hungers for a dyad.
Sweet, saccharine, almost Carterian in nature. Carterian in the sense that it favors characters over people. A seeming lack of an internal world, every momentary fleeting thought externalized into a digital package for consumption. And consume I do! But tragedy, inside was something else: the razor blades of youthful halloweens passed.
My maw too greedy to take a simple bite, my throat too eager for infiltration to simply chew, the knives pass down into my internals.
I made my dyad someone else. I became defined by how I am not Her, and the ways in which we were similar faded into the background. She became my ideal almost definitionally, a true Moralist Innocence. This did a lot of damage over time I think. Eventually I constructed a dyad that did not involve Her, that was totally in me, but for the briefest of moments, my sense of identity and who I was became entirely contingent on an external force, and that's terrifying. It is terrifying in the way that I think True Love is, because to fall completely in love, to be engulfed in it with no way out, you must surrender part of your identity to them. Again my maw too greedy, I rushed this process. It needs years to be done proper. It needs a lot of vetting. You must be sure you understand the other person completely. I did not.